RE: Chick with a dick. No, seriously.

I got this reply to my post from yesterday. I post it here completely unedited. It doesn't really need a response, but there is one at the bottom. Give a person enough rope...

wrote: > > Well... you can call me whatever you want, I put no stock in it. You > can't consider my genitalia in a vaccuum, you need to consider my mind
Christina -- no one has said this..you are tilting at gender windmills of you own making! Two aspects need to be taken together, plus one's plans/desires for the future.//
> as well. I currently identify as female, but I'm in no big hurry to > cut my parts off. I'm satisfied with being female as I am, and it's a > hell of a lot better than forcing myself to present as male.
Christina- already stated this point, which you chose to not read at all. This a completetely twisted use of the word "female" which does mean "between the legs. Gender and your sex is two different things and misusing basic words is intentionally misleading yourself and others. Females have viginas and males have dicks. If you mean a woman versus man (gender terms) then use them, or otherwise you come across as ignorant, or as I see as intentionally misleading. Reread my intial post if you can't figure this out. Also is confusing to the public when we should strive for better clariety. No wonder they continue to reject the whole TG as a vague mislabeled grouping. Because of people like you now even drag queens are not only calling themselves TG but even TS. Your type open a door that anyone can go through and call themselves TS. Heck even weekend CD's and lesbians can call themselves TS. Why not call yourself a full time CD, or TGist or whatever. Transsexual means "change sex" and you don't intend to do that so you are a fake in my book. And you like to spout off about the HB standards when you don't have any yourself.//
I have > seen this happen: a guy gets into crossdressing for whatever reason, > they decide to label themselves as a transsexual,
C --- yea that's a main point, self labeling without any standards and you fit that criteria (saying living full-time is far from any decent criteria)..big deal.//
then they proceed to > FORCE THE ISSUE, and they do the hormones, surgeries, RLT, and so on, > ***because someone told them that's what transsexuals do,
yea, and who did that?!...the people you have already said are the professionals and make the calls...I don't buy that, but if self labeling and screw up then live with your choices.
and they > have labelled themselves as such*** Because of the application of the > label, the person was unable to see the mistake they were making... > they just assumed "I'm TS, so this is what I have to do." They became > just as constrained by our community's label as we are by society's > labels. They allowed the label to define them, instead of the other > way around.
C--- And full time crossdressers like you are the best example of this!...and who smokescreen as TS// > > Is it so hard for people to accept that my sex (I had written "is > male", but it's more like "is of no importance"), and my gender is > female? I have considered myself female since I was around 5 years > old, which is about as far back as I can remember. Through the years, > people have tried to tell me that means this or that, but *I decide* > what it means to me.
C ---now you get to redefine what "female" means besides redefining what TS means? What?....not! you made up your own sex/gender definitions to suit yourself..and I don't buy it. You can't even accept the difference between gender (head) and sex (between legs). You are just confusing youself, but not me or any reasonably intelligent person. No wonder the public stays confused about who is what and where they are going with gender/sex. You want to be a chick with a dick then say so, or go with TG but stop piggybacking on the real McCoys of those wanting to be females...true TSs.
I can listen to opinions and so on, but unlike > some people, I take that information and then think for myself.
C--- yea, and reinvent labels and definitions. I don't buy it and it hurts the greater community.//
I form > my own opinions about what I want to do, and I don't let anyone tell > me otherwise.
C--- yet just a few days ago you argued for the professionals to control us and what to do. Rather flip flopping are you?//
I don't know what kind of guys you hang around with, but > I'm going to venture a guess that none of them consider themselves > female. I'm also going to go out on a limb and say that the prejudice > within our own community is pressuring people to consider sexuality > and gender as something that must be made the same at all costs, even > though we are constantly saying that those are two seperate things.
C --- yea, something about common well accepted definitions that bothers those that don't want to be clear about who they are, like you. There are plenty of terms to use or invent that best represent people like you, and to leave the ones that best fit definitions to their own proper use.
> The hypocrisy of some people just drives me nuts.
C--- Yes and you are a prime example of this, promoting HB crap.// > > Perhaps my situation is unique, but I highly doubt it. What's more > likely is that there are many people out there like me, but they are > afraid to admit it because when they do, they have to deal with people > like you calling them men.
C --No one here doing that, and again you fail to distingish between gender and sex. You are a male with hopefully a woman's mind, but beginning to wonder about that. You are NOT a female at this point. At least I didn't lie to myself when was pre-op, much less ever think I was some non-op at any point. Intent, not timing, is the point.
And there's really no point in that except > to insult the person. > > I will admit that there are people, like the one in my scenario above, > who are not genuine transsexuals, and there are people who make the > wrong decisions.
C--- Well, I haven't met very many TS that didnt' know who they were, or made wrong decisions. A few CD fail to admit they were that, because they couldn't accept that status, like you. Whatever you, after hearing you please don't have SRS, you are ways fromt that point!//
It's not up to me to point that out to them though - > it's their own busines, their own life, and if they want to fuck it > up, then it's their own problem. I feel concern for those people, and > I will occasionally give my opinion and try to help them sort out > their own feelings,
C--- Good! Because you can't even get gender/sex terms straight, much less judge who is a true TS! Would be the blind advising the blind!//
but I have no business telling someone they are > not who or what they claim to be. I love discussing this kind of > thing, and I listen carefully to the opinions I hear, and occasionally > something will cause me to re-think my situation, but that's what I'm > going to do - re-think it, not just adopt someone else's thinking.
C--- Yea, you failed to even read my message before posting your own drivel, and pretend you were addressing what I wrote. I think and write my own views, and you dont' know crap about what I wrote, or apparently care to consider another stronger view. So to me you just lied to me and yourself with the above statement. Just copy and paste crap from your past encounters. // > > There is a lot of discussion on these mailing lists about how to > classify, divide, and identify people. Do you not understand that all > that does is serve to classify and divide us?
C--- Yes and for good reason to go for some clariety. Only to those who deliberately choose to confuse terms and definitions, in large part to sneak in under a different category then they truly fit is problems created. What's wrong with you being a TG...after all many people like you tend to like that term. Nothing wrong with that if you like being a full time CD or whatever, because the only thing that changed, or is different, about you is your GENDER from your malehood! Don't continue to state that sex is same as gender or you need to buy yourself a basis dictionary.//
It doesn't do anybody > any good to try to apply taxonomy to our situation. That's one issue > that we constantly complain about... that society wants to throw every > human being into two discrete sexes.
C -- BS! What is being advocated to to make terms that define various conditions in-between the two sexs/genders, and varous well labeled combinations of both aspects. Otherwise the wrong trend/idea is to create one single TG label for every gender variation which doesn't mean anything of any importance, and which puts you back in the box with drag queens, which as a group those of true TSs used to want to be disassociated with for many years.//
How can we complain about that, > and at the same time be arguing about classifications within our own > community? Don't try to force me into a box, I won't go, and you're > likely to get scratched up trying to put me in there.
C--- So pick your own box, just don't twist and fake your way into the one with me and other true TSs. Trans-sexual again means just that "change - sex" and sex does mean "between the legs" and anything else is smokescreening for being something else, whether CD's, drag queens or whatever. Pick another label....any label!
BTW, recently read on a drag queens's personal site that they claim to be TS, just because they are full time and had some FFS. But this person won the "Miss Junior Gay America" contact a few years back, and main occupation is doing drag shows (lives down in Texas). So is a drag queen (gay with a dick), lives and advertises as such but still on their site claims to be TS. Yea,.. right. People like this and Jasimine open the door for this kind to claim to be TS, and the entire gay community to included as TG (which some groups now state are included as such).
Labels exist for good reason, not to box in but to reflect some reality and due perspective. If you don't like the box, fine tune it to be better if it was wrong to begin with (was not) or invent your own. If you don't like the standard well defined boxes then make your own, but don't contaminate or fake your way into another by twisting terms, or lowering the entrance bars (here were made with due rationale), or trying to be vague about your own status. It's bad enought that the general public very often assume that someone claiming to be TG are TS, but to say one is directly a TS and yet the people love their gential as is (penis in this case) and has no desire to change that to match their claimed gender is just plain fraud in my view, and to the public's if they knew. And if the public knew that males were getting their BC's changed to "female" while keeping their penis (genitial completely intact) then they would be outraged! This is fraud to everyone in my view.
And again, if you don't like the reasonably defined gender/sex boxes then invent one yourself and jump on in. Don't use mine to disguise what and who you are. Otherwise any woman who ever wears pants or any guy wearing panties and jerking off can claim to be TS. Balony on that "open door policy." Your efforts will eventually undermine all the true gains we have gotten for decades, and why most new laws/ordinances use the "transsexual" word to protect against certain discrimation, and once they find out some are just sneaky crossdressers without any real basis for claiming TS status you will cause a major backlash against us. Your kind is twisting, mistating true intent, and outright lying at times just may affect my current status, and may very well cause BC's to be ignored, or worse... invalidated.
What is worse in your case is you supported the HB standards in one post, but do you expect the so called professionals to not use standard terms and basic categories? The much stronger dividing line is not whether full time or not (most CDs state they would love to be full time...whoopee!) but whether they would have SRS if possible (even if totally free or not). Even a drag queen can be full time...so what?
And finally there is no category that is "bad" but is bad if the boundries are ignored, and one's options are blurred or confusing. Clearer terms = better choices = better decisions. And every good decision (or "best" one at a given time) well considers many variables in a bigger perspective. Confusing "sex" with "gender" is not good termonology nor leads to a better and clearer perspective.
You, and ones like you are a contradiction in perspectives, and intentionally misuse basic terms, and ignore basic good arguements which is why you and the other failed to quote a single word I wrote in my initial post on this topic. Side stepping, using twisted terms and views is what I see. No wonder many need professional help to straighten basic terms and groupings out.
Good luck to you, whatever you really are. Judging by your own standards the professional drag queen mentioned is more a woman than you have shown yourself to be, and better looking on top of it. At least they admit they are a drag queen even if claiming to be a TS on top of it. > > That's my morning rant :) > Now back to some real work! > Jasmine
C--- Good for you...just hope you aren't a medical provider of some sort, much less a doctor...hate to have medical terms and devices all confused if a patient!
Christina
PS Read you other claim elsewhere...and you are not the way "most TS look". I look a hell of a lot better. Because I did what needed to be done to get the job done! And better looking that most natal woman on top of it (even 20 years younger).
>

Here's my response:

<You wanna fight like angry men? You got it. This is all about you, that oughta satisfy your ego.>

Again with the ego trip and the total misunderstanding? Am I writing in Japanese or something? Are we really just arguing over the meaning of words? Because it feels like you are attacking my identity. It feels like you are saying I have no right to be who I am? AND WHAT THE FUCK DOES ANY OF THIS HAVE TO DO WITH HOW PRETTY I AM?!

Saying you're better looking than me is a sign of someone who's really grasping at straws. I am perfectly passable, although I am not done with my transition, and if you're looking at my photos from 4 years ago and making that judgment, then I suggest you compare them to some of your photos from your awkward days, unless you're perfect enough that you didn't go through that phase. Some of us have real life responsibilities and can't afford to do everything we want. Some of us don't have the luxury of a perfect transition like you had. I have two children which are my highest priority, and if I have to postpone things because of them, then I will, and nobody has any right to call me less of a person because of that. Now then, I'm not a drag queen - I'm not a prostitute - I'm not a transvestite - definitely not a gay man. I guess I'm a nobody.

You are an asshole. You need to get over yourself and stop thinking that your way is the only way. You are wrong about this, plain and simple. I have a right to exist this way, and if it's simply the use of the word "transsexual" that you're angry about... then you can keep your stupid word. I for one, don't want to be associated with people that have your problem, whatever it is, and if calling myself transsexual means I have to be lumped in with you... I'll think of another word.

I used to suffer from the competetive ego trip that you're on, but I got over it when I realised how stupid it is. I know exactly where you're coming from, and there's some major logical flaws in it. Trust me, I know how you feel when someone you think is inferior wants to put themselves into your superior world. So I'm not a perfect tranny... get over it. You're the only one who is.

Go to hell, jerk.
Jasmine

BTW, don't accuse me of not reading what you said. I read it and I disagree. I said I didn't read it all, but I did go back and do that. I still think you're wrong. I use words as they are commonly used, and I disregard your rigid, overly technical 'definitions'... language doesn't work that way. We're not writing scientific papers here.

Chick with a dick. No, seriously.

Someone responded to this blog, by completely missing the point and deliberately trying to insult me by calling me a man. They said if I like my penis, then I'm no different from any other man. I strongly disagree, and here's my response:

You can call me whatever you want, I put no stock in it. You can't consider my genitalia in a vaccuum, you need to consider my mind as well. I currently identify as female, but I'm in no big hurry to cut my parts off. I'm satisfied with being female as I am, and it's a hell of a lot better than forcing myself to present as male. I have seen this happen: a guy gets into crossdressing for whatever reason, they decide to label themselves as a transsexual, then they proceed to force the issue, and they do the hormones, surgeries, RLT, and so on, because someone told them that's what transsexuals do, and they have labelled themselves as such Because of the application of the label, the person was unable to see the mistake they were making... they just assumed "I'm TS, so this is what I have to do." They became just as constrained by our community's label as we are by society's labels. They allowed the label to define them, instead of the other way around.

Is it so hard for people to accept that my sex (I had written "is male", but it's more like "is of no importance"), and my gender is female? I have considered myself female since I was around 5 years old, which is about as far back as I can remember. Through the years, people have tried to tell me that means this or that, but I decide what it means to me. To quote GWB... "I'm the decider, ok?" I can listen to opinions and so on, but unlike some people, I take that information and then think for myself. I form my own opinions about what I want to do, and I don't let anyone tell me otherwise. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that the prejudice within our own community is pressuring people to consider sexuality and gender as something that must be made the same at all costs, even though we are constantly saying that those are two seperate things. The hypocrisy of some people just drives me nuts.

Perhaps my situation is unique, but I highly doubt it. What's more likely is that there are many people out there like me, but they are afraid to admit it because when they do, they have to deal with people like you calling them men. And there's really no point in that except to insult the person.

I will admit that there are people, like the one in my scenario above, who are not genuine transsexuals, and there are people who make the wrong decisions. It's not up to me to point that out to them though - it's their own busines, their own life, and if they want to fuck it up, then it's their own problem. I feel concern for those people, and I will occasionally give my opinion and try to help them sort out their own feelings, but I have no business telling someone they are not who or what they claim to be. I love discussing this kind of thing, I listen carefully to the opinions I hear, and occasionally something will cause me to re-think my situation, but that's what I'm going to do - re-think it, not just adopt someone else's thinking.

There is a lot of discussion on transgender mailing lists about how to classify, divide, and identify people. Do you not understand that all that does is serve to classify and divide us? It doesn't do anybody any good to try to apply taxonomy to our situation. That's one issue that we constantly complain about... that society wants to throw every human being into two discrete sexes. How can we complain about that, and at the same time be arguing about classifications within our own community? Don't try to force me into a box, I won't go, and you're likely to get scratched up trying to put me in there.

That's my morning rant :)
Now back to some real work!
Jasmine

The wolf is in the henhouse... because he sounded like a hen.

This is a portion of a discussion from another site. It's about customer service call centers in India... Here's what someone had to say in response to "Bill" who complained that Indian phone operators were lying about their names (in italics). My response follows.

sushila wrote:
Bill - just to clarify - people are not made to "lie about who they are"...it's actually part of their training in India - believe it or not - it's a whole new industry back home (my home ie) - entire training institutes have sprung up where they teach Indians to speak "American" - change their name to one that's easily recognized by Americans etc..someone with my name (eg.) would just be shortened to Sue but complicated non-translatable Indian names (of which there're zillions) would be changed to Jill, Jane and Mary etc.

As for the outsourcing issue - guess I've just been lucky - I've never lost a job because of this - maybe it's because I've been working mostly on govt. contracts. [smilie:Errmmm...]

Lastly - it's funny about the language problems that many have complained about when dealing with Indians - I have come across very few people here in America who have even a modicum of the communication skills that many of the Indians I know have - so if language was the sole reason why there must be no outsourcing then there really is little to choose from... [smilie:Smile]

Guess it really all boils down to where you get the most bang for your buck - [smilie:Shocked]

Here's my response:
I will admit that American isn't exactly the same language as English, and that many Indian people speak English better than most Americans. However, what you're saying is that people, who aren't forced to, but decide to lie about their names and fake their accents are just doing the same thing everybody else does, so it must be ok? A whole industry has sprung up to teach people how to deceive others and this is seen as a good thing? And then if they learn to do it well enough, they can come over here and work for our government?! Sorry to be blunt but I have a problem with that. Is this the price of capitalism?

I support the progress that the world is making in international commerce. I think it will likely be the force that finally brings humanity together in peace, but I would rather speak to a 'Mohinder' who's honest with me and trying his best, than a 'Moe' who isn't Moe, but plays one on the phone.

Please comment,
Jasmine

Why do we fight?

Transgender people sometimes get into some heated arguments over who's really a transsexual and who's not. This can be extremely frustrating to people, particularly when they are just coming out. Sometimes people are having valuable discussions and they simply disagree. That's a positive thing because it helps others figure out their own opinions. I think what makes it difficult is when someone assumes that, simply because you are transgender, you should all agree on everything, or since you don't agree with something, you are not transgender.

There's a large group of folks out there who are all hung up on the idea of defining what it means to be a 'real' transsexual. That, I think, is simply male egotism - it's "I'm a better tranny than you", and it's completely unnecessary. So, if someone calls you out for being less than genuine, you're well within your right to call them a man, which is how they are acting. Trying to get respect for the choices we make is a battle we fight every day, and it's hypocritical for one of us to disrespect the way that someone else chooses to identify. If it's out of genuine concern, like for someone who's rushing into SRS and not thinking first, then by all means help that person, but don't turn it into a pissing contest. Leave that for the men.

Some people are totally fixated on surgery. They don't understand the non-op decision. They don't fathom the possibility that gender identity is about how the world sees you and how you feel inside, and not about the parts you carry around. I fully expect people to treat me as a woman the rest of my life whether I decide to have surgery or not. I like my sexual organs actually... and a good number of people will say that makes me 'not transsexual'. I have no tolerance for that viewpoint, and the associated bashing that goes along with it. I don't go around on the street asking women to prove that they have a vagina... it's nobody's business, and it does not define your gender identity - YOU define your gender identity, which is what the transgender community has been saying all along.

I've been known to disagree strongly with people about certain subjects, mostly politics, but I don't disrespect anyone's choice about how they want to identify. Admitting to yourself that you are TG is serious stuff, often quite painful, and once someone comes to that realisation, it's completely pointless and quite hurtful for others to come along and disagree with that.

I think all human beings enjoy an argument, but when the argument turns into a testosterone-fueled ego trip... well that's just wrong. We are NOT IN COMPETITION with each other... we are sisters in a really tough position. We are not going to agree on everything, but we should at least agree to respect the decisions that others make.

Take care of each other!
Jasmine

PS: People have gone so far with me as to tell me to stop using such a whorish name! How insulting is that! This is the name that hundreds of people know me by, and I realise it's not the most passable name, but jeez...

Picks: NFL Week 12

Note: Games in bold I picked right, and games in italics, I biffed. Games in normal type have not been played yet.

Lions over Dolphins
Cowpies over Buccaneers
Broncos over Chiefs
Colts over Eagles
Giants over Titans
Ravens over Steelers
Falcons over Saints
Bengals over Browns
Bills over Jaguars
Redskins over Panthers
49ers over Rams
Vikings over Cardinals
Patriots over Bears
Jets over Texans
Chargers over Raiders
Seahawks over Packers

That's 11 correct picks. Won again at the office.

Guess I won't be marrying Howie Mandel anytime soon

So I usually don't play the "Lucky Case Game" on Deal Or No Deal wtih Howie Mandel, but I realised the money is almost always in case 1 or 6, and that the votes usually fall in the standard distribution, with 1 and 6 being the least picked. Very strange considering sometimes they show the current votes in the middle of the show. Anyway, what's weird about it is that when I sent in my vote, here's the message I got back (verbatim):

From: 59595 Thx 4 playing. Vote 10X Max-$.99/vote othr chrges may apply. Watch DOND 4 winner-Howie is married with 3 kids. Watch DOND Thanksgiving nite-U could win $100K 7:25pm 11/20/06

WTF? Why does it say Howie has a wife and 3 kids?

Also, I watched the show a while back and a young lady had some bad bank offers, followed by a better one, for ONE DOLLAR more than the previous offer. At that point, Howie went into some kind of banter about "you know what that means", and they immediately opened the contestant case revealing the highest remaining amount on the board. What? Somebody please tell me what that's about?

Joan Collins

I think Joan Collins is one of the most beautiful women to ever live. That's it. Enjoy the photos...

I think all these photos are public domain. If any are not, let me know and I will take it down.

Picks: NFL Week 11

I've won the office pool two weeks in a row, and a few times before that. On two seperate weeks I got all games correct. I've won the office pool more than anyone else in the office, so I decided to post my picks each week. Feel free to use them if you like, but keep in mind: I know nothing about football, don't check the odds, and don't know the teams. I make my picks from psychic intuition. Anyway, here's Week 11:

Rams over Panthers
Redskins over Buccaneers
Titans over Eagles
Bears over Jets
Saints over Bengals
Vikings over Dolphins
Chiefs over Raiders
Patriots over Packers
Browns over Steelers
Colts over Cowpies
Ravens over Falcons
Texans over Bills
49ers over Seahawks (hmmm...)
Lions over Cardinals
Broncos over Chargers
Giants over Jaguars (Monday)

I'll post the winners on Monday and how many I got right (correct ones are in bold).